Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie;

How can you not love MST3000? I mean REALLY?!

So these 2 robots and a human make fun of a movie while it's playing.
The movie they hilarify (totally my word) is called This Island Earth.
(Tom Servo, Crow T. Robot, Mike, Dr. Forrester are MST characters. Everyone else is from This Island Earth. To help, I shall bold MST names.)

These quotes are a ton funnier if you've already seen the movie or while you're actually watching the movie.


Crow T. Robot: Into the weenie mobile, weenie man away!

Mike: Joe, I'm in one of these boxes, find me!

Crow: Hey! Who sneezed on the credits?
[The credits had an outer space background]

Tom Servo: Okay, let's see here... Shatner, Shatner... no, doesn't look like he's in this one; we're safe.
[He was looking at the opening credits]

Crow: Man, the universe is really cruisin'.
Tom Servo: Hey, look, there's Taurus the bull.
Mike: And right underneath him the constellation feces.
Crow: Hey, look, Orion's broke.

Crow: Hey, Mike, you think you can toss me my calculations? Thanks! Ah, here it is. "Breach Hull - All Die." Even had it underlined.

Joe: You know what my kids would say?
Crow: YOU'RE NOT MY REAL FATHER?

Crow: Wow this must be what its like inside a bong! Whehue!
[The characters had to go into this converter tube that filled up with smoke on the spaceship to make their bodies adjust to the next planet's gravity... or something]

Tom Servo: It's the amazing technicolor cheese wedge!

Tom Servo: Ah, they're going 65, so they'll be there in 3 BILLION years...

Exeter: Now place your hands above the rail [hands suddenly attach to the rail] ...they're magnetized.
Crow: And if your hands were metal, that would mean something.
[One of my favs]

Crow: Looks like Dr. Seuss designed their planet!
Tom Servo: Oh, they're flying into a Roger Dean album cover.
Crow: They're very into "Yes" on this planet.

Cal Meecham: Relocation? To where?
The Monitor: To your Earth.
Exeter: A PEACEFUL relocation...
Crow: After the genocide, of course.

Crow: Oh, my god! My waffle! Oh the humanity!

Crow: You killed the Hubble!

Mike: Doesn't the fact that it's universal make it international?

Plane Voice: Good morning, Dr. Meecham.
Tom Servo: Good morning, Voice.
Plane Voice: Hope you slept well.
Mike: 'Cause it's time to die.

Crow: Nuts! It's Ted Kennedy in a Barney suit!

Exeter: I won't ask you to condone what we've done...
All: We condone it.

All: Normal view. Normal view! NORMAL VIEW! NORMAL VIIEEEEW!
[This really only makes sense if you've seen it...]

Exeter: Into the converter tubes. Ruth, you take the first tube. Cal, you take the second.
Cal Meecham: What about you?
Exeter: I'll take the third tube.
Tom: Oh, right. Stupid question.

Cal Meecham: I may just be the dumbest man who ever lived.
Mike: No argument here.


Once again, actually WATCH the movie to fully enjoy these quotes.

Last edited on Nov. 30, 2008 at 7:05 pm.